So, the long and short of it is that I made a mistake last weekend. I got carried away in a feeling, and it led me down a potentially dangerous path. Worst of all, it didn't make me feel better. It didn't quell that sadness left behind by my ex. It didn't fill the void, not even temporarily. It wasn't rooted in love, nor anything like it. So, I have felt empty this week and worried about the consequences. All I can do is continue to breathe and move forward, which I've been doing with remarkable grace, all things considered.
Where I am today? Well, I went on a WONDERFUL date last night with a kind man, who also happens to be vegetarian, and exceptionally gorgeous. We started out with dinner at a vegan restaurant in the village, where we had AMAZING quesadillas and taquitos, we had vegan ice cream at my favorite shop (also in the village), and we walked all over the city. We walked through Chinatown and Little Italy, we walked over Manhattan Bridge and the Brooklyn Bridge. We rode through the abandoned train station under City Hall. And we never ran out of things to talk about or had any lulls in the conversation. It was completely organic, sincere, and euphoric. In all, we had an 8-hour long first date, and it was pretty much magic. There was a kiss, too, so that was sweet. ;) Basically, we had an excellent time together, and we are going out again this Saturday to go rock climbing (I forgot to mention that he is a climber and has insanely sexy arms)! This meeting alone has rejuvenated me. I was in a dark, lonely place this past week in which I was ready to give up on love entirely. The animal passions can't be the only things that drive us; they're empty. We have to be made for more. We have to be made for love. I know it. And with just a GLIMPSE into my night with this awesome guy, my suspicions have been confirmed.
What a wonderful reminder that it's all gonna be ok, and all is not lost.
I have dates lined up every night this week, actually, including tonight. I went on a date tonight with a guy I'd recently met, but I definitely don't feel any chemistry, and the attraction is not entirely there. The same can be said of the guy I'm going out with tomorrow. This is how I have amassed so many male friends, lol. I have a date scheduled for Friday to go to the Met with a cute Jewish guy (one of my weaknesses), and while I'm looking forward to it, I don't know that the chemistry is there. We spoke on the phone today, and he was pleasant, for sure; he just seemed nervous. We'll see. Regardless of how any of my upcoming dates go, I can't ignore the chemistry I've found with this other guy and how giddily excited I am to see him this weekend. Is this the beginning of something good? :)
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