PERSISTENCE

Fall is a time for reflection and analysis on the many months passed: have I attained the goals I set for the year? Have I become a better person?

I sit here tonight overwhelmed by school and work and the deep-set desperate desire to be doing something I love. I'm starting to feel stir-crazy at my job. Even for the "time being", I feel like I deserve and should be doing something I enjoy. There's no guarantee for any future, so all I can do is push forward, work hard, and hope like mad.

I've learned with concrete understanding this year what my job as an actor actually is. We performers dream of being on a stage in front of packed house getting all the laughs or conjuring all the tears. We want to be effective and fulfilled, and we want it right now. But the art of being a performer is not so much the act of performing as it is the art persistence. So many of us, no matter how talented we are, will hear "no" more often than we'll hear yes. We will go through more self-analysis than perhaps anyone else in any other profession. Each "no" feels like a venomous slash at our dreams, a personal attack against us as artists, and we retreat to a place of self-doubt and sadness, even if momentary. But the true art of being a performer is persistence. It's learning that a "no" is an invitation to try again, to hold on, to be patient. Persistence is learning to say, in the most dignified way, "I'll be back, and I'll be better than ever".

School also relies on the fine art of persistence. So often I look at my present and think of how much more magical all would be if not for this nuisance in my day. I want to just be doing what I love, not learning about doing what I love. But then I remember that part of my education is honing the invaluable quality of persistence. If my theatre degree holds any worth, it is this lesson alone that will go with me for life. PERSISTENCE. So many performers I admire, TALENTED people!, have been rejected, turned down, and otherwise brushed over for great opportunities, but they still show up on the radar because THEY PRACTICE THE ART OF PERSISTENCE. I want to hone that kind of staying power, stick-to-it-ness, as it were, and through that practice, finally be able to do great work on a larger scale. Check out this blog entry about actors who got passed over for roles on The Office:
http://twentytwowords.com/2013/08/06/famous-actors-who-didnt-get-the-parts-audition-for-the-office-in-2003/

That's all I've got in me for now. It's time to go to sleep and wake up ready to practice and persist in all areas until the time is right. Until then, I will stay positive and stay motivated.

"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."
- Calvin Coolidge

"One's best success comes after their greatest disappointments."
-Henry Ward Beecher